Doc Love is the author of "The System: The Dating Dictionary." In his book he answers the question: Why does a woman choose to stay with one man versus another?
I have applied his principles for several years and believe it is the best relationship model for men and women. His fundamental goal is for a man to find the right woman and keep her in love forever. What do you think about his material?
Key points of "The System":
Reality Factor - Men have a tendency not to face reality when it comes to dealing with Miss Right.
Bottom Line Factor - Only her actions truly reflect her feelings and attitude towards you.
Female Interest Level - The most important factor. A thermostat of a woman's romantic feelings for you. It is a scale from 0% to 100%.
90 - 100%: She is in love. The goal is to get and keep her here by practicing the male strength qualities.
51 - 89%: The higher her interest level, the more fun you will have. The lower her interest level, the more she will nag, graze, and act moody.
49%: The point of no return. A guy can't raise her interest level above 50% again. One example of reaching this point is hearing "I need my space."
40 - 49%: She may be with a guy but is gathering resentment to make a clean break. She is generally unpleasant to be around and open to flirting with other guys.
0 - 39%: She walks. It's like she was dating the guy 100 years ago. She has moved on.
Back - You can never go back. The resentment and reasons why it didn't work are still there. If she wants to come back it is to satisfy her ego and will be temporary until she finds something better to do.
60 Days - Wait 5 - 9 days between phone calls. Only go out on weekdays. Friday and Saturdays you disappear completely. If she starts with 51% interest level or above then after 9 dates (~60 days) she will be in love. Once she is your girlfriend then you can see her up to 3 times per week.
Physical Attraction Test - When a girl first meets a guy she determines whether she has 51% or higher interest level based upon his appearance and communication.
Maintenance Program (Respect, Affection, Romance, Humor):
Respect - Say no to her once in a while and stand your ground.
Affection - This only applies to when she has 90 - 100% interest level. Quietly hold her in your arms for 10 seconds, stare into her eyes, act like you enjoy it, no kissing, when meeting her and and departing.
Romance - Do something special or buy her a small gift every few weeks.
Humor - Diffuse direct questions with humor like Jim Carrey. No matter what she asks, or how many times she nags you, she'll only get a funny answer. Keep it light and funny always (no religion, no politics, no sex, no negatives, no putdowns).
Male Strength Qualities:
Confidence (Self-Confidence, Self-Esteem) - Know all of the system principles. Humor is one way to show confidence. She has to know where the line is drawn where you will walk without you telling her.
Control (Discipline, Patience, Self-Control) - Patience is the key to women. She initiates touching. Practice manners and class always. No public displays of affection (PDA). If another guy checks her out be cool and take it as a compliment.
Challenge - Let her chase you. Only use the phone to setup a date. No social networks or instant messaging. Be honest and closed with personal information. Spoon feed her over a lifetime. Move very slow, stop, backup, this raises interest level.
Female Traits (Attitude):
Integrity (Loyalty, Trust, Honesty) - Would you go into business with this woman? Is this someone you can trust?
Giving - She pays for the dates once in a while. Does she offer a backrub or give you the phonebook to call a Chiropractor?
Flexibility - A girl who is not structured. Someone who is playful. Is she hassle-free?
Marriage - Date her for 2 years and watch her attitude (Integrity, Flexibility, Giving) for red flags. Show that you can keep her in the 90's. Then she can ask you to marry her (or hint for you to ask). Keep practicing the system (study 15 minutes every night). Date your wife. Be a challenge. She initiates touching. Make a place away from her like the garage or live in separate houses. Say "I love you" a handful of times in your lifetime.
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